How To Provide Powerful Coaching To Your Staff.

By Bob Wall
Friday, 14th March 2008

Coaching is a conversation about performance, addressing what someone did well or providing information that will help improve performance.

That is all coaching is…a simple conversation. Some performance management systems are so complicated and bureaucratic that the simplicity and ease of coaching has gotten lost. But to be effective, coaching is a conversation that benefits from applying a simple structure that is easily committed to memory.

The following structure serves as a mental organizing device. As you approach the employee to offer praise or developmental feedback, the model serves to organize your thinking and your communication into a logical sequence. Once your thoughts are organized, you deliver coaching in a manner that is natural for you. You don’t want your coaching to be awkward or sound canned, like you’ve just been to a workshop.

A Structured Format For Coaching

1. Opening Statement
“I want to talk to you about (general area of performance.)”

2. Observation
“I’ve observed (describe performance or behavior).”

3. Impact
“The impact is (describe the impact on the job being done)”.

4. Request
“From now on, I’d like you to (describe improved performance or behavior).”

Write this model on a card, carry it in your pocket, and memorize it. As you will see, you will use this structure very flexibly but if you memorize it as written, you have a path to follow in formulating feedback.

Purposes of each step in the structure
The opening statement is used to get the employee’s attention. If you always begin coaching with this simple phrase, they will learn to pay attention because you have something important to say to them.

Step 2 is very important. You much provide specific, concrete examples so there is little chance of miscommunication. For example, “You did a lousy job of cleaning rooms today” is a harsh communication that provides no information to convey what you observed. “I noticed that there was dirt left in the corners, that you hadn’t vacuumed under the bed, and that the floor of the shower stalls were a bit sticky and needed better rinsing and drying” is much more specific.

The same principle applies to praise. “I noticed you did a great job with that tour this morning” sounds nice to hear but doesn’t describe what you liked. Far better to say, “I noticed that your mood was upbeat and welcoming. You introduced yourself to each guest as they got on the bus. And your comments during the tour were both informative and very entertaining.”

Step 3 links your observation to the job. You aren’t taking time out to provide coaching merely because you might be irritated. Instead, you want to tie your coaching to some aspect of the job that is important. For example, “One of our core values is impeccable cleanliness in every aspect of our resort” reminds people why you are concerned about their performance.

The same holds true of praise. “We promise our guests a level of service that is unparalleled in the industry for friendliness and efficiency” ties your praise for the tour direct to one of your organization’s core values.

Step 4 is used very flexibly. With praise, end with a simple “Thank you. I wanted you to know how much I appreciated how welcoming you were to our guests.”

In delivering developmental feedback you have a couple of options. You might go on to describe exactly what you want the person to do from now on. But a better strategy might be to describe the performance problem and why you consider it a problem. Then ask if the person agrees that this performance needs improvement. Follow that up by asking the person what they need to do to make the necessary improvements. If you get people involved in improving their work, they will be much more committed to following through with it than they might if you just demand that they do so.

Coaching for Emotional Intelligence

Coaching to develop someone’s EQ is much more delicate because the feedback can get so personal. You must earn the right to deliver this kind of feedback by taking time to get to know your employees and establishing relationships with them that are both personal and professional. Your employees will accept coaching more easily if they know you care about them as people and that you are committed to helping them be as successful as possible. Coaching on personal characteristics must be done within the framework of a supportive relationship.

You must also make a habit of delivering genuine, heartfelt praise on a regular basis. In a sense, your employees are not doing their jobs. They are doing parts of your job for you. As a manager, you are accountable to your boss for work done by other people. So when they are doing things right, if you don’t appreciate it, you’d better re-examine what it means to be in a leadership position. When your staff perform well, you look good. And if they perform poorly, your boss doesn’t have a problem with them…he or she has a problem with you.

Some managers act as if coaching would be a nice thing to do if they had the time. But if you are not coaching, you are not leading. Whenever something doesn’t go well in your area of responsibility, the only question to ask is “What am I doing – or failing to do – that is contributing to this situation? Often as not, you’ll find that you aren’t providing enough coaching.

EQ is very important in the hospitality business. It doesn’t matter how technically proficient your people are, if they can’t work together as a team and provide world-class service to your guests, you have a problem that must be addressed.

Suppose someone makes a suggestion in a staff meeting. You notice Ralph sigh, roll his eyes, and make a comment to a coworker. Immediately after the meeting call him aside and say, “I want to talk with you about something I observed in the meeting. When Betty made a suggestion to help us coordinate the various events happening every day, you got a look of scorn on your face, sighed audibly while rolling your eyes, and made a comment to your friend, Jack. One of our core cultural values is that we listen to each other with respect, even when we disagree. I don’t know if you noticed but Betty was embarrassed and the discussion of her suggestion came to a halt. No one else was willing to risk offering another suggestion.”

The first goal in coaching for EQ is to raise people’s awareness. Ralph may have been doing this kind of thing all his life and may not recognize the negative impact he has on other people. If so, you want him to start paying attention to his reactions during meetings and live up to your cultural value of listening.

Suppose you have one of your wait staff, Jim, who doesn’t handle complaints very well. One night you observe that a guest complains about her food being cold. Jim does exactly what he is supposed to do. He apologizes and takes the food back, promising to bring a hot dinner right away. But you also notice subtle nonverbal facial expressions that indicate that this is a real irritant and that he thinks the guest is being too demanding.

People are exquisitely sensitive to facial cues that convey emotion. Although the guest will get a hot meal, she may not feel good about how the interaction was handled. Call Jim aside and talk about it. Point out that he did the right things but that his facial expression looked like he was irritated and put out. People often have facial cues of which they are completely unaware. You might even need to imitate the expression you saw on Jim’s face and ask him how that might have made the guest feel about the service she was getting. Ask him to start observing himself much more carefully in situations like this and monitor any nonverbal expressions that convey irritation. The next time you see him handle a similar situation but with a smile on his face, call him aside a praise him for handling the situation with more grace.

Also look for opportunities to praise people for emotionally intelligent behaviors. I once led a management retreat in a hotel. When I arrived about 45 minutes before the event, I realized that the table arrangement had to be changed to encourage discussion and allow frequent movement into small groups. The people who had set the room had done so with obvious care and attention to detail. Every place setting was perfect; pens, writing materials and water and glasses on every table.

I hated to do it but the success of the meeting was at stake. I called my contact person from events planning and explained that the room needed to be entirely reset and that we were short on time. She replied that she would in about two minutes. In a few moments, she burst into the room with three people to help reset the room. She listened with genuine interest to what I needed and why I needed it. She assured me that the hotel wanted nothing more than to support our group in any way required. She quickly gave direction to break down the room, get rid of the tables and bring in rounds. All of this she did with grace, even going so far as to explaine to her helpers why the new arrangement would result in a better meeting.

She couldn’t have handled the situation better. Her work crew, however, needed a little coaching. They did exactly what was required, quickly and neatly. But the expressions on their faces and the occasionally slammed chair made clear to me that they did not appreciate having to set the room twice.

That is the hospitality industry captured in a single moment. I had made a last minute but essential request. My contact person handled the situation with grace and a commitment to serve. But her helpers needed coaching on doing whatever is required with a smile on their faces rather than giving into nonverbal petulance as they did what they had to do.

Your people are constantly interacting with each other and your guests. A good coach is constantly on the alert - providing praise where it is deserved and developmental coaching where it is required. Start watching your people carefully and you see that your people, except for new hires still being trained, know what to do and how to do it. The difference between a very good hotel and a great hotel lies in coaching people how to handle delicate moments with equanimity and the display of emotional intelligence. And coaching makes it so…

©2008 Bob Wall

For 28 years, Bob Wall has specialized in accelerating the development of leaders and teams in the workplace. Whether serving as an executive coach, doing an assessment of a corporation’s culture, providing customized team development and planning events, or delivering management and staff training, the common thread through his work is EQ, i.e., emotional intelligence…those personal characteristics and social abilities shown to be essential to success in the workplace. Recent research has demonstrated that no matter how intelligent and professionally trained people might be, if they lack the ability to work with and through other people, they are not likely to achieve their full potential, a finding with profound implications for those involved in leading and developing today’s companies.

His two most recent books provide a roadmap for leaders wanting to build corporate cultures that nurture EQ. Coaching For Emotional Intelligence (2007, AMACOM) provides leaders with a structured approach to coaching for performance and to develop their employees’ EQ. His latest book, the Second Edition of Working Relationships: Using Emotional Intelligence to Enhance Your Effectiveness With Others (2008, Davies-Black Publishing) provides an understanding of relationships in the workplace and offers readers a practical methodology for building teams and resolving conflict. Bob can be reached through his website, www.bobwallonline.com to learn more about his services and the use of the EQ Profile, an uncannily accurate assessment of EQ that Bob has used successfully in fifteen different countries.